Friends can be great to have during time of fun and sorrow. But when it comes to chasing your dreams, I suggest you to better walk a lonely path than relying on friends.
Suppose you live in a hostel surrounded by your friends. You plan to go to cinema hall to see a movie by 6 pm. Say, you come back from college by 5 pm, get fresh and you have half an hour left before you join you friends to go to cinema hall. But you have half an hour left. In that half an hour you decide to finish up tomorrow’s important project. You can do that. But you cannot if you tell this plan to your friends. They would drag you to chit chat. They will make you lose that half an hour. You can say no to them and get back to project but you cannot because they are your best friends. That is the point. Do not make them your best friends. Because a true best friend would always want you to work harder. Unfortunately there are no such friends.
Though you kept 2 hours for enjoyment with your friends (movie), you are made to pay an extra precious half an hour, just because you listened to your friends more than you listen to yourself.
Consider your intellectual quotient is 7 out of 10. And your friends’ average intellectual quotient is 6. If you hangout with your friends, over a period of time you will be dragged to an intellectual quotient of below six. Because negativity has great power to pull down positivity. It can crush creative thinking. It can wipe off an incredible dream. It can suck up all your energy.
You are living with your friends. They are part of your life. Without them your life will be incomplete. I agree. But do not trade your intellectual dreams, ideas and positive spirit with them.
Protect it. Preserve it. Do not listen to your friends saying that you cannot do something. Do not let them say that you cannot be best at algebra. Do not believe them saying that you cannot sing better.
You see, if Steve Jobs had believed in a his naysayers the world would not have had Apple today. His thoughts were crazy, his method of working was insane. He was obnoxious. He was intolerable. Because he used to challenge status quo. He was pushing things forward forcefully. He was relentlessly challenging his engineers to think above and think beyond.
With that much of insanity, commitment and ruthlessness towards inertia only, something can be achieved my friend.
Imagine what would have happened if Sachin Tendulkar preferred hanging out with his friends rather than practising cricket in his teenage.
If you keep on listening to your friends and family advice that you have to play it safe, you can never achieve the things that are haunting your mind right now. Like a mother protects her newborn child, protect your inner most desires, positive attitude and your dreams from your friends. Preserve them in the deep corner of your heart and nourish it with utmost care.
Listen, share your happiness, fun moments etc with your friends. But do not share your dreams, ambitions and positive energy with them.
Master Vagbhata, in Ashtanga Hrudaya, Sutrasthana 2nd chapter says –
भक्त्या कल्याणमित्राणि सेवेतेतरदूरगः ।
bhaktyā kalyāṇamitrāṇi sevetetaradūragaḥ |
Bhaktya kalyana mitrani seveta – Good friends shall be served with affection,
Itara dooragaha – Whereas the others (wicked) should be kept at a distance.
It is hard, it is difficult. It is not for everyone. It is painful. There is a lot of inner struggle in doing this. Loneliness, keeping your idea alive when no one is with you can push you to depression.
But its rewards are the sweetest. It is the way to glory, it is the way to lead a successful and meaningful professional life.
I know that you are born to change this world for better. Have trust.